Katlego Sekhu
Anonymous is caught at a crossroads. His wife passed away two years ago, and he recently met someone with whom he’s fallen in love. He told his children about her; however, his eldest daughter doesn’t want him to move on and has threatened to move in with the maternal grandmother if he continues with the relationship.
“My wife passed away two years ago, and life has just not been the same since. She left me with three kids between the ages of seven and fifteen. A few months ago, I met a lady who is also widowed and has two kids. When I told my eldest daughter, she told me that she does not accept the lady and that if I continue with her, she will live with her maternal grandmother. Mind you, when my wife passed away, they wanted to take the kids.
“I made it clear that as long as I’m alive, I am going to raise my kids. I am in love with my current girlfriend, and more than anything, I love how we have shared an experience and how our love comes with understanding and vulnerability. I don’t want to leave my daughter, but eventually, I am going to have to move on. I don’t want to lose my girlfriend and my daughter, but one person will get hurt. What can I do?”
One listener advises: “The guy needs to spend more time with his girlfriend and his daughter because they need to grow together. They need to learn from each other. They need to learn each other’s bad habits. That’s how they are going to grow and love each other. From there, they are going to start to move forward together,” she said.
Another listener knows someone who’s been in a similar situation and missed out on happiness because he didn’t want to hurt his daughter. “I know someone who is still single because his daughter didn’t want him to move on. He must sit his daughter down and explain to her that one can’t make themselves happy. She must understand that in six years she will also want to move on. Who will the father live with then? The TV and the remote? He must also assure her that he is not here to replace her,” she counseled.
