By: Poelano Malema
Over the years, women empowerment has been at the forefront of gender equality discussions. For centuries, men were the breadwinners while women stayed home to take care of the household. As the narrative changed, the dynamics that have come with women empowerment have been difficult for many couples to deal with.
Dr Didah and Phanthi Mokwena, Marriage and Relationship Coaches, say money should not be the foundation of any relationship. How much a person earns should also not be the determining factor of their role in the relationship, but couples should work together.
“When money is the foundation of your marriage, it will be difficult to work together as a couple,” says Dr Phanthi.
Working together means the couple sees the money as “their money” instead of each partner seeing the money as his or hers individually.
The marriage experts say in their practice they have faced women who can’t handle the power that comes with money, and some feel overburdened when they have to take care of most of the expenses in the home.
“We can say men are intimidated by strong women, but we’ve met a lot of women in our therapy session who complain about having it tough financially or some feels like they can’t provide for a man. However how many men are breadwinners in marriage, and you won’t hear them complaining about taking care of their family?” says the couple.
The relationship coaches say roles should not be defined by the pay cheque.
“Our advice to men is that you must not lose you position as a leader, a guider, and protector of the family,” say the experts.
“A strong woman still needs your guidance and leadership,” they conclude.