By: Natasha Archary
Do you play the villain or hero in your life? Self-sabotaging is a behaviour that causes one to undermine their own success, despite success. It stems from low self-esteem, negative self-talk and emotions which are continually reinforced by any failure.
Recently Naomi Osaka opened up about playing the villain in her life, with her negative self-talk. Defending US Open Champion Naomi Osaka is the latest sports star to open up about mental health after pulling out of the French Open to focus on her negative mindset.
She went on to further explain that, “I’ve never told myself that I’ve done a good job but I do know I constantly tell myself that I suck or I could do better.”
This Monday on Midday Joy with Unathi, listeners shared similar scenarios in their lives where they either played the villain or the hero.
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Part of the reason people play the villain in their own life is that they don’t believe they deserve to be happy. They take the victim mentality where they’re constantly putting themselves down and/or push people who support them away.
Isolating from their support structure, not committing to their partner and finding faults with every minute aspect of their life are some of the ways of self-sabotaging. Changing your mindset and developing self-supporting behaviours instead can help people move from the villain to the hero in their own story.
According to Psychology Today, people play the villain in their lives for different reasons such as procrastination, perfectionism and pressure. For example, being a perfectionist like Naomi Osaka means being dissatisfied with even a little progress.
Playing the villain in your own life means listening to the voice inside your head that’s often filled with self-doubt, fear and feelings of inadequacy.
It’s easier for people to be more supportive of others than their own goals and abilities. As Unathi pointed out, it’s important to speak to yourself with the same love and kindness you give others.