By: Natasha Archary
The things you allow at the beginning of your relationship, will continue throughout your relationship.
As previously discussed on The Best T In The City, it’s normal to tolerate things for the sake of love.
But while acceptance is one thing, allowing your partner to do whatever it is they want to, so you avoid conflict can build up to the point it wrecks the partnership.
Love is blind, and it can be what prevents you from noticing that you are putting up with things you wouldn’t usually accept.
Deal-breaking behaviour from a partner ranges from not feeling prioritized, to a neglect of any of the love languages you subscribe to.
Unhealthy relationship patterns should not be allowed to continue, and you should have your feelings validated by your partner.
A general guide of things you shouldn’t allow in a relationship
- A controlling partner
Control includes anything from telling you what to wear, or getting upset when you have to work late. It’s typical toxic behaviour that should not be present in a relationship.
- They gaslight you
If you bring up something you’re not happy with and your partner reacts like you’re imaging things, you need to address this with your partner.
Convincing you that you’re being ridiculous or making you feel guilty for expressing your concerns, are not positive traits someone you’re in a relationship with should exude.
- Abuse of any kind
Often, controlling behaviour transitions to abuse. Whether verbal, emotional or physical, one should not tolerate any form of abuse. This goes for both men and women.
- Coercing you to have sex
No is no. Even in a relationship, if your significant other says no to sex, coercing or forcing your partner to have sex should never be allowed.
Marital rape or rape with a partner is not uncommon. But rape is often defined as unwanted sexual intercourse with someone you don’t know.
No one has a right to your body without your consent, not even your partner.
- Isolation
If you’re not allowed to have a life outside your partner, it’s a sign of control. Isolating you from your friends and family is a red flag and it means your partner is trying to assert their dominance over you.
Also read: The Best T in the City: #TheWorstTimeForSex



