Anonymous is worried her friend might embarrass her
Katlego Sekhu
A listener shares that her best friend is set to host their stokvel at the end of this month.
Her main concern is that her friend is untidy and her home is usually quite chaotic.
Anonymous worries that, because she was the one who introduced her friend to the group, the situation could reflect badly on her.
Reaching out to The Best T in the City with Tbose, Anonymous wants to know whether there are any blind spots she may be overlooking.
“I’m feeling really anxious about an upcoming situation. We’re hosting our stokel opening party at the end of January, and the host is a close friend of mine – she’s actually someone I introduced to the stovel last year.
“This will be the first time she’s hosting the club. The problem is, she’s not very tidy. Her house is usually quite chaotic, and I’ve never said anything before because I didn’t want to hurt her feelings. But now, by extension, I feel responsible for her making a good first impression. Now that the stokvel ladies are coming over, I’m torn. I don’t want to embarrass or judge my friend, but I also don’t want to expose the group to a space that might make people uncomfortable or reflect poorly on the stokvel’s standard.
“I’m feeling responsible, yet unsure how to handle it. How do I gently raise the issue of tidying up without making her feel attacked or ashamed? How do I support my friend while still protecting the group’s comfort? Do I urge Exco to conduct a site visit under the guise of ensuring things are up to standard? Depending on one’s budget, members can also elect to host at a venue of their choosing, using the allocated hosting budget; anything above that is on them. Do I suggest this to her? Or do I just let her be, and if she flops, exco will deal with her?”
To hear the full blind spot, listen to the podcast.
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