Katlego Sekhu
A listener shared that his wife recently caught him cheating, again. He admitted that this wasn’t the first time, but this time, she packed her bags and left.
What took him by surprise, however, was that she left the kids behind.
He feels this is unfair, especially as he works long hours. Reaching out to The Best T in the City with Tbose, he’s now wondering whether taking the kids to his wife’s parents is a good idea.
“Earlier this year, my wife caught me cheating, red-handed. This wasn’t the first time, but this time, she packed her bags and left. I understand her decision. Honestly, our marriage hadn’t been improving, and divorce felt inevitable.
“What shocked me, though, is that she left our three kids with me. She calls them occasionally but hasn’t spent much time with them. She told me I would be the one to explain why she left. I know I hurt her deeply, but being left with the kids feels unfair, especially since she knows I work long hours. I’ve had to ask my cousin to help out just to manage.
“I always believed that mothers couldn’t be separated from their children, so I don’t understand why she’s doing this. Is she punishing me? And if so, at what cost? The kids?
“What’s even harder to process is seeing her out and about with friends, enjoying her life, while the kids barely see her. I acknowledge my mistakes and take responsibility, but I don’t think I can be the primary caregiver in the long term.
“Would it be wrong to ask her parents if they could take in the kids? So I can focus on work and providing for them, but I feel that, for the sake of stability, they would be better off with their mother or grandparents. How do I navigate this? What could be my blind spot here?”
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