Katlego Sekhu

A listener shares that she no longer trusts her mother around her partners. In the past, her mother slept with one of her exes, which shattered their trust.
She is now in a new relationship and fears her mother might repeat the same behaviour. She feels torn between warning her new partner or simply giving him a heads-up.
Reaching out to The Best T in the City with Tbose, Anonymous wants to know if there are any blind spots she may be overlooking.
“I’ve been dating my boyfriend for a little over a year. My cousin’s wedding is coming up, and I’d love for him to attend with me, but I’m not sure I can trust my mother around him.
“My mom had me when she was just 15, so the age gap between her and my boyfriend isn’t huge, she even dates younger men herself. My last relationship ended because my mum and my ex were secretly seeing each other behind my back. I caught them red-handed, and though I wasn’t deeply in love with my ex and we moved past it, I’ve never forgotten the betrayal.
“My mom has promised it’ll never happen again, but what worries me now is that my current boyfriend has dated older women in the past. I really love him and see a future together, but I’m afraid that if they meet, my mum might betray me again.
“Should I warn my boyfriend about what happened with my mom and my ex, or should I keep it to myself and trust that my mum won’t hurt me again? I love my mom—she’s my best friend—but I’m terrified she’ll brick me once more since she’s comfortable dating men my age. How can I best handle this? What might be my blind spot?”
#TheBlindSpot
— #MothoWaBatho (@tboseZA) May 7, 2025
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