Katlego Sekhu
A husband has reached out to The Best T in the City as he feels his marriage is falling apart. His wife has developed the habit of drinking excessively every weekend and occasionally not returning home until the next day, leaving him and the kids neglected. The husband has tried discussing this issue with her, but she shows no remorse or willingness to change her behaviour.
“My wife is a groovist at 38 years old and I think I have reached a point where I can’t take it anymore. To the outside world, we look like this perfect couple, but from the inside, I am falling apart. I have always considered myself to be an understanding husband. The kind who doesn’t mind his partner going out to let her hair down every now and then, but since last year, my wife has been going out every weekend, from Friday to Sunday sometimes.
“At times, she and her travelling party will come back home the next day. When I confront her about this, she asks, ‘Where is it written that a wife must not come back home the next day?’ She doesn’t mind leaving me and the kids while she is out clubbing. She has passionately defended her position to date, and we have yet to reach an agreement. She has also started smoking and doesn’t mind coming back home the next day. Is this some form of late adolescence or a deeper reason to consider?”
Anonymous
A listener believes the husband could be facing a serious problem. “Firstly, I’d say that it is important to consider your partner’s feelings in a relationship. I feel the wife is being unfair and inconsiderate. She must go out; however, she must not neglect her family.”
Another listener, Elena, suggests that the couple should consider seeking marriage counseling. “I think your marriage has a lot of cracks in it, and there are other issues that you haven’t addressed. Your wife might be doing this to vent. Maybe you don’t let her express herself enough, so she keeps it to herself and goes partying it out. I think you should seek marriage counseling and allow her to speak her mind. She could be depressed while you are unaware. She could be crying out for your attention. You should seek marriage counseling,” she advised.
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