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“My mom left me after marrying my stepdad”: The Blind Spot

By Katlego Sekhu

Photo by Albert Rafael: https://www.pexels.com/photo/woman-kissing-cheek-of-girl-wearing-red-and-black-polka-dot-top-1101730/

Wednesday’s Blind Spot on The Best T in the City with Tbose is a tough one. Anonymous is finding it hard to forgive her mom who wants to reconcile after leaving her behind when she married her stepdad.

“I have a love-hate relationship with my mom. When I was 3 she decided to get married to my stepdad and left me with my grandmother. Everything was fine between my grandmother and me, however, after finishing matric I decided to come to Joburg and live with her,” shares Anonymous.

“She told me it couldn’t happen because it would ruin her marriage. She asked me to go and live with my aunt and it was all well. I could visit but I wasn’t allowed to sleep over. Fast-forward to last year my dad passed on. Now my mom is reaching out and there is a void between us and it’s hard for me to forgive her. I feel she chose her other family over me, her firstborn. I don’t know what to do.”

Anonymous

Kaya 959’s news reader Mbali Dlamini says our parents have put us through a ‘lot of trauma as children’ which should be addressed.

“The person in the Blind Spot was left behind at a very young age, so when you say you want to come back and your mom tells you that you are going to ruin her marriage it hurts,” she explains.

“Because to love your spouse you have to make a decision but loving your children should come naturally. The mom made a conscious decision to love someone else over her child. So she is right to say ‘You chose someone else over me and now that they are no longer here you want me back.”

However, she notes that it’s important to reconcile and let them know how ‘their actions have affected us.’

Read Next: “My mother blocks me whenever we have an argument”: The Blindspot

Written by: Katlego



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