Katlego Sekhu
An anonymous listener recently contacted The Best T in the City with Tbose for some advice. She and her partner have a tradition of going on holiday together every year, which has always helped keep the spark alive in their relationship.
However, this year her husband has expressed a desire to go on holiday alone to have some time to himself. While Anonymous understands that this is a healthy request, she is finding it difficult to accept since they have always gone on holiday together as a couple.
Seeking guidance from The Best T in the City with Tbose, Anonymous is wondering if there are any blind spots she may be overlooking.
“Hubby and I have been married for ten years and in these ten years, we always take a baecation in November.
“My husband usually plans everything, and this year we agreed to go to Kenya. About a month ago, hubby sat me down and told me that he would be doing a solo trip instead of going with me to our yearly mjolo’cation. I was taken aback.
“When I asked why, he said he needed some alone time. Our marriage has not been at the best place, but I feel these getaways helped us reconnect. This might not be personal from his end, but I have taken serious offence. I mean where does that put us?
“If he wants alone time, he must do it outside our annual escapade. That’s our time, right? I want to offer to plan it and pay for him, that way I won’t feel like I am the problem and of cause. I would know where he is and with whom. Am I on the right track? Or am I missing something?”
One listener believes that this is an unfair request from the husband. “He can do his me-time at a different time. Why choose your time to do his me time? Something does not add up. Maybe he is not happy anymore.”
Another listener doesn’t see anything wrong with the request. However, they believe that the husband could have chosen a different time since this is something they usually do together.
