Katlego Sekhu
A married couple has been sleeping in separate bedrooms for over a year, and it has become their new normal. The wife, who insists that she never kicked her husband out of their bedroom, is worried that their situation won’t change and that divorce may be on the horizon. Seeking advice from the Best in the City with Tbose, she wants to know if there are any blind spots she might be overlooking.
“About a year ago, hubby and I got into a hectic fight, and we slept in separate bedrooms that night. It’s been a year and a couple of months later, and we still haven’t gotten back to sleeping in the same bed. We still talk and are raising the kids together; however, it is starting to feel more like roommates than husband and wife. We haven’t been intimate in five months, and it has become the norm for us.
“When he comes back from work, he plays with the kids, and then he goes back to his room. I’ve never kicked him out of our bedroom. He decided on his own that we were going to sleep in the guest bedroom. None of us have addressed this issue, and what’s worse is that on weekends, he no longer sleeps in the house. I still love my husband a lot, but right now divorce looks like the only option. Should I bring it up with him because I fear our marriage will end?”
Anonymous
One listener emphasizes the importance of the couple seeking a resolution, saying, “With the way things are, you can’t continue to stay silent. It looks like he could have found someone else, and you are saying nothing about it. You are just content with being at home while he goes in and out whenever he pleases. Confront the situation and maybe go to counseling; he hasn’t already moved on.”
Another listener, who’s currently experiencing a similar situation, counsels the couple to sit down and find common ground. “What I am picking up is that you guys do not want to speak about it. Maybe you can draw conclusions after you have spoken to each other. However, it’s better to try and find a solution.”
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