Zuko Komisa
Anonymous is grappling with deep hurt and resentment towards her boyfriend’s grandmother, who made cruel and unprovoked remarks about the appearance of her five-month-old son.
Now, faced with the prospect of providing her decor services for the grandmother’s upcoming 85th birthday party – a contribution her boyfriend assumed she would make freely – Anonymous is questioning why she should extend a kindness to someone who insulted her child.
“Uncle T, my boyfriend and I welcomed our first child last year. When our son was about five months old, my boyfriend suggested we take him to the Free State to introduce him to his grandmother. When he handed our baby over to her, the very first thing she said was, “What an ugly baby boy.” My boyfriend warned me that his grandmother was cold and not the warmest person, but I was still shocked. At first, I thought she was joking – but then she said it again. After we left, my boyfriend’s mother told me not to take it to heart. She said her mom is old and tends to be mean. I tried to brush it off, but it really stayed with me. In July, they’re planning an 85th birthday party for the grandmother.
I own a decor company, and my boyfriend offered my services as his contribution to the event. Under normal circumstances, I would’ve done it without question – and without expecting payment – but after what she said about my son, I honestly have no desire to do anything nice for her. Would it be unfair for me to tell my boyfriend that they can still use my services, but I want to be paid like any other client?
Why should I go out of my way for someone who insulted my child, and worse, wasn’t held accountable by anyone? I know asking for payment will probably shock my boyfriend, because he’s expecting me to do it for free, but I don’t want to. What could be my blind spot? – Anonymous”
Kaya 959 listeners shared their views on how anonymous should handle the situation with her boyfriend’s grandmother.
Listen to the full conversation here:
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