By: Natasha Archary
The mother and son relationship is often sneered at by the woman the man chooses as his partner. “Mama’s boy” is a term used to describe a man’s close relationship with his mom and it’s often viewed as an unhealthy bond.
A listener requested that Sizwe unpack why some men cannot make a move without checking with their moms first. From his 15-year experience in the motor industry, he noticed that many men put their moms down as beneficiaries.
Relationships with men who put their moms first creates a power struggle that can make the wife or partner feel powerless.
Dating a mama’s boy
When the relationship is new, you probably think it’s cute, even sweet that he takes such good care of his mother. Over time, little nuances in their relationship may become too much to put up with.
A mama’s boy is easy on the eyes and heart. They are feminists, chivalrous and romantic. Being raised by a strong woman helps a mommy’s boy centre his life on the safety and success of his family.
There’s nothing wrong with a man loving his mother but women draw the line when he runs every decision past the woman who raised him. Many women feel threatened by a man’s closeness to his mother, you can count that her life revolves around her son.
She depends on him and him on her. They have developed this symbiotic relationship that neither are really happy with. But it’s how they have survived so far. She may have already chased a few suitors away.
The son knows nothing but to be dependent on his mom. His dependence on her creates a safe place for him to turn when all else fails. She’s his voice of reason and his first place of comfort.
For many men who are raised by single moms, especially, ensuring his mother is taken care of in her later years is important. They feel indebted to her for all the sacrifices she made in raising him.
The reason a women is against this is because she feels her partner should prioritise their relationship, forsaking all else.