By: Natasha Archary

Ask any woman about her dream wedding and she’ll probably be able to give you a blow by blow account of every minute detail, right down to the number of fairy-lights. It’s no secret women dream about this perfect day for a long time.
Often we are so focused on the perfect wedding day that we lost sight of the bigger picture, the wedding costs and who is footing this bill?
Most couples save for years in order to throw a lavish wedding, and cover all the expenses right down to travel and accommodation for guests.
But let’s be honest, weddings are just a status flash, for family and friends to see just how “well off” you are. Some take out loans and end up paying it back until well after the first year anniversary.
When it comes to the costs of the bridal party, the groomsmen and bridesmaids dresses and suits, does the costs fall on the bride or groom or each member of the bridal entourage?
Wedding or marriage: What are we prioritising?
We’re so determined to have the perfect wedding day that nothing else matters.
The average cost of a wedding in South Africa is roughly between R70k and R150k. Throw in a designer wedding dress, shoes and matching bridesmaids’ accessories and this figure is likely to snowball into a much larger sum.
People get sucked into the emotional side of it all, and don’t have an honest enough conversation with their future spouse about finances.
“Can we afford this? No? Okay so let’s cut costs.”
Instead, in a bid to impress the future in-laws and the girl you gave a diamond ring to, you bite your tongue and decide you’re willing to do whatever it takes to make her happy. Well, then if it were at all possible to buy happiness, we would all be living THE life now wouldn’t we?
We prioritise the wedding day, not giving any further thought to the days, months, years that follow. We’re not willing to have the real conversations about how there will be difficult days and unforeseen circumstances. Moments you’ll need to sacrifice together or selflessly. Health scares and financial trouble.
Are you marrying someone who will help get you through those days? Or are you marrying someone who can throw money at a problem and hope it goes away?
Drive 959 listeners weighed in on the conversation and this is what they had to say:
Also read: “My cousin, whom I helped find a job, didn’t invite me to his wedding” – The Blind Spot



