Zuko Komisa

Anonymous finds herself in a difficult position, torn between acknowledging the positive co-parenting dynamic between her husband and his ex, and her deep discomfort with their financial exchanges.
While she appreciates the collaborative effort in raising their children, the revelation that they lend each other money has triggered feelings of insecurity and a fear of potential disrespect.
“Uncle T, a few weeks ago, I found out that my husband and his baby mama lend each other money. It was my stepdaughter’s birthday party, and we all went to a party venue. My husband’s baby mama and I are on good terms-we all work together to raise the kids. However, she let it slip during the party that she owes my husband R3000. I didn’t say anything then, just laughed and brushed it off, but when we got home, I confronted my husband.
He said he and his ex help each other when the months are tough. Honestly, I found this disturbing. Yes, they have a good co-parenting relationship that works for everyone, but I feel that’s where it should end. My husband sees nothing wrong with it and even told me to stop being insecure.
But in all honesty, I feel like this opens the door to his baby mama disrespecting me, especially since I don’t understand why he would need money from her or lend her money, because as far as I know, we’ve never really run short. Am I wrong for feeling this way? What could be my blind spot? – Anonymous
Kaya 959 listeners shared their perspective on how Anonymous should handle this situation.
Listen to the full conversation here:
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