Katlego Sekhu

A listener recently reached out to The Best T in the City to share her dilemma. She loves her current boyfriend, as he has many great qualities, including his love for family.
However, after two years together, he has never posted about her on social media, and she wants to be loved openly. His excuse is that he no longer wishes to share his love life online after his marriage ended.
What hurts the listener is that she regularly posts about him.
“Uncle T, I reconnected with my partner on Facebook. We went to high school together and have known each other for years. He was previously married and would always post his ex-wife and kids.
“We have been dating for almost two years, and he has not posted me once. His excuse is that he no longer wants to love loudly and would rather we keep our relationship off social media. This really bothers me because I also want to be loved loudly. One of the things that drew me to him was how family-centred he was, and I just feel like I am a secret.
“Yes, he shows love and is a good boyfriend, but him not posting me hurts. I do post him from time to time even though he said we must keep our relationship off social media. Am I wrong for feeling this way? I just feel that posting each other affirms that you are happily in a relationship. What could be my blind spot?”
One listener advises ‘Anonymous’ to appreciate the love her partner gives her, as nothing else truly matters. Furthermore, she warns her about the dangers of “monitoring spirits.” She says, “Once people see that you’re happy in your relationship, envy sets in—and you don’t need that kind of energy around you.”
Another listener, who has also been through a divorce, points out that since the man has experienced heartbreak before, he may be avoiding posting about his current relationship online as a way to protect it.
Listen to the podcast to hear what other listeners have to say.
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